Britney Spears has finally filed for divorce from long-time freeloader Kevin Federline.
TMZ.com reports that Spears filed for divorce on Tuesday, citing "irreconcilable differences", legal-speak for "okay, you're right, he's a boob". The pair married in October 2004, just two months after Federline had his second child with actress Shar Jackson.With Federline's descent into forgotten oblivion likely to be a rapid one, the hip-hop world have collectively rejoiced at the news. He recently released 'Playing With Fire', a collection of ungodly sounds, bravely described by Federline himself as "an album".
Spears also filed for legal and physical custody of their two children, one-year-old Sean Preston and two-month-old Jayden James. Federline was unavailable for comment, though it is likely any comment would have been preceded by thirty seconds of confused silence, followed by the words, "Me head hurt, go now".
REPORTERS UPSET
Not everyone is entirely pleased with news of Kevin Federline's forthcoming fall from prominence. Whilst the divorce story will provide a fitting final hurrah for Kevin Federline jokes (see above, paras 1, 2, 3 & 4), he will be sadly missed as a reliable, continual source of editorial amusement.
Fellow Undercover reporter Andrew Tijs says, "all we're left with is the hope that this divorce will be half as ugly as the current McCartney-Mills divorce saga."
Freelance journalist Juan-Pablo Chavez was more philosophical, explaining "in the end, we should be happy that Federline will soon be a forgotten entity. It's what we all wanted. But I really think we were only beginning to scratch the surface of 'Popo Zao' jokes. He will be missed."
